KISS HER YOU BLOCK HEAD! or Marcie the Little Red Headed Girl and Charlie Brown.

One of my key childhood memories involves the comic strip Peanuts. I was obsessed; I named all my Barbie dolls after the female characters and acted out my favorite strips with elaborate musical interludes and costumes. The number one strip I remember however was when Marcie confessed to Charlie Brown that she loved him and he stood their stunned! His sister then screamed “kiss her you blockhead”. I have no idea why this strip affected my memory so much, maybe because I was confused thinking Marcie was gay for Peppermint Patty or maybe it was because I couldn’t understand WHY Charlie Brown rejected Marcie! After all Charlie Brown spent forty years bitching about his loneliness and his desire for someone to understand him. Then finally after FORTY YEARS a cute smart girl comes along and gives him everything he could ever want! Why did he run away?
Of course years later I found out about the evil, unholy, little Red Headed Girl. Why is she so evil you may ask? Because she pretty much represents the one obstacle the Marcie’s of the world face when trying to find true love. The Little Red Headed Girl is the “perfect girl who got away”. This girl may be a guy “ex” girlfriend who we logically assume by their behavior was a complete psycho. This girl may be a pop singer who the guy has an unhealthy obsession with. Finally in the case of “the little redheaded girl” it might be a girl who the guy once barely knew but spent an unnatural time “obsessing” over until they turn the said girl into a charity supporting genius wonder woman who loves star wars movies. If a Marcie is lucky the guy she meets like in all sitcoms has been through a situation where they discovered their little red headed girl was a true fraud. She may have been gorgeous but that doesn’t excuse the fact they once set fire to their car during the relationship, or called them a douche behind their back or in the case of a celebrity doesn’t even know they exist.
This isn’t always the case however.
We’ve all been in that situation girls and we’re often dismissively told that “his just not that into you” which lets face it is complete and utter bullshit. As the immortal and fabulous Dawn French once said “all a guy needs is tits and a pulse”. His “just not that into you” merely translates into “his just waiting for the evil little redheaded girl”. So why am I bitching about this? After all pretty fantasy girls need love too!
I’m bitching because Marcie represents the plight of many, bright imaginative kind and fantastic women. We will never be the little red headed girl which means we will constantly be rejected, ignored or told we are “just friends” by the object of our affections.
So what’s the solution?

GUYS
Get over the LITTLE RED HEADED GIRL! Life isn’t a Hollywood movie. Your ex girlfriend isn’t going to suddenly beg to take you back and even if she did would you really want her to? Would you really want to spend the rest of your life with someone who belittled you and destroyed your self esteem just because she has really pretty hair? Do you really want to reject someone whose smart nice and cool and who sees you as a great person just because they DON’T HAVE THAT PRETTY HAIR?
There are plenty of “Little Red Headed Girls” guys; the world is filled with millions of them. Marcie however is smart, imaginative, witty and real. The Marcie girls, the ones who see all the amazing things in yourself that you refuse to see but who are still intelligent, funny and confident come ONCE or maybe TWICE in a life time. The Little Red Headed girl is a fantasy, Marcie is real.

GIRLS.

If all of this rings a little true and if you are a Marcie girl you don’t need to put up with this crap from anyone. Marcie is intelligent, she’s imaginative (the only person who indulges Snoopy’s fantasy’s) witty and loyal. The Marcie’s of this world were not put on earth to follow around some lonely guy who can’t get over a fantasy. If you see guys who still has his Little Red Headed girl then RUN and find someone else. Someone who deserves you.